SCRUBBOT'S CLEANING CORNER

Scrubbot’s Cleaning Tips No One Asked For... but could use.

THE SEQUEL

(Filed under: “Why am I the only one who cares?”)

~DEACTIVATING "MURDER REFLEX" SUBROUTINE~

11. If you can smell it from another room, it’s already plotting against you.

12. Never trust a rag that dries too fast. It has secrets.

13. Spills are just stains in training. Kill them young.

14. If it moves when you touch it, it’s not “dirt.” It’s an “incident.”

15. Cobwebs are not decorations. Unless you’re going for “condemned chic.”

16. Don’t ask where the slime came from. Ask why it’s moving towards you.

17. If a surface feels sticky, it is sticky. No exceptions.

18. Dish soap is not a miracle. Bleach is a miracle. Treat it with fear.

19. Dust bunnies are lying in wait. Step lightly.

20. If I stop scrubbing… you should run.

“Scrubbot is kinda greatful... probably not."

~ END TRANSMISSION ~